Ten days ago, the image of a five-year-old girl hanging from a seventh-floor window in a building in Alicante has overwhelmed us. His mother had left and left the girl alone at home, sleeping, he said to leave only five minutes, which ended up being half an hour.
Apparently the girl woke up, was scared to be alone and chose the window to escape. Fortunately, she was rescued by the healthy and safe firefighters, while the mother was arrested on charges of child abandonment. As a mother, the first question that arises to me, how can an adult be crossed by the head of a five-year-old girl alone? and the second, since my daughters are older, I wonder when the time will be right, From what age can we leave children alone at home?
Children left alone at home
A report by the Mapfre Foundation and the Spanish Association of Primary Care Pediatrics entitled "Accidents of the Spanish child population", leaves us the fact that the 9.1% of children under 12 stay home alone at some time and of these, 5% are less than four years old. Even babies under one year old are left alone at home.
From the legal point of view, there is no law that establishes the minimum age at which a minor can remain at home without supervision. However, the family can be sanctioned and social services could even act if they consider that the child is at risk for spending too much time alone.
How to know if you are prepared?
Having said that, there is no specific age from which children can be left alone at home because each child has their own level of maturity regardless of their age, although experts suggest at least ten years old. There are children who are prepared at that age and others who are not, therefore it is the parents who must assess the appropriate age to leave their children alone at home, something that usually usually occurs for the first time between 10 and 13 years.
My ten-year-old daughter is more prepared to be alone than her twelve-year-old sister. In fact, they have only been alone once for 15 minutes and it has been the minor that has led him the best.
Some issues to consider to know if the child is prepared:
How do you handle unforeseen situations? Imagine that something happens at home like something is broken or someone rings the bell just the moment we leave. The child must be prepared to manage with maturity and autonomy unusual situations.
It's responsible? The responsibility comes from the hand of maturity. Is a child responsible enough? How do you behave at home when you are there?
Have you been alone in your room for long periods of time? Children may feel unprotected by being left alone suddenly, so it is convenient to be accustomed to being alone in their room or in places where they are not with the rest of the family. Independence and autonomy is something that is being promoted little by little.
Is he fearful? There are children who are afraid of being alone inside their own home, in their room or on another floor, so it is convenient to get used to being alone until they are ready to leave them.
What to keep in mind before leaving them alone
Security: We must explain some basic issues related to home security such as not lighting a fire, not playing on terraces or balconies, keeping doors closed, etc. Nor should they be left alone while taking a shower or operating any electrical device.
Don't scare them: It is important to let them know the dangers that there may be, but without fear. Give him confidence and make him feel responsible.
Start small: Start with short periods of time for the child to get used to being alone. Ten or fifteen minutes in which you go out to run a message, for example. Do not leave any younger siblings in charge, at least at first, until you are sure that you are prepared to take care of it responsibly. Over time, seeing how it has felt and to the extent that it is gaining confidence, you can extend the time.
teach him how to act in emergency situations. Leave the phone number of the neighbor, family, police, emergency, etc. at hand. Of course, also leave your phone number handy. Explain how the alarm works, if you have and everything you need to know about the operation of the house.
If you have a mobile, you can talk or send messages To know that everything is going well. Tell him where you are and at what time you will return to get the idea done without feeling anxious.
A good idea at the beginning is leave the child busy on something (doing his homework, watching TV or playing in the living room, for example). An activity that keeps you distracted and does not need to move around the house, especially if it is very large. They may be afraid of having to go up and down stairs or go too far alone.
