Now that Christmas is just around the corner, meetings with family and friends are common to share a pleasant moment with the people we consider our loved ones and close ones. It is a time when the warmth of home is felt and family ties are very important.
However, it can also be a time when many parents, when trying to teach their children to be educated, force them to give kisses or hugs to relatives they never see or to people that children do not know.
That's why the Girl Scouts from the United States published an article on their website, in which encourage parents not to force their daughters to hug people, even for Christmas.
Cases of sexual harassment in Hollywood
The Girl Scout article was published after the scandal of the year in the world of cinema, when many cases of sexual harassment by Harvey Weinstein, one of Hollywood's most influential producers in recent decades, came to light.
These accusations opened the door for dozens of actresses to start raising their voices not only against Weinstein, but also of other men within the film industry. And now, Girl Scouts come together with a statement, in which They strongly remind parents that no matter they are Christmas, you should not force anyone to do something you do not want, even if you give a hug.
She doesn't owe a hug to anyone
In the article entitled "Reminder: She doesn't owe a hug to anyone. Not even at parties", the organization starts talking about the Christmas season and how they are times to get together as a family, but at the same time, they could be a situation where girls are given the wrong message about consent.
Have you ever insisted, "Your uncle just arrived, go give him a big hug!" or "Your aunt gave you that cute toy, go and kiss him", when you were worried that your son would not show affection on his own? If so, you may want to reconsider doing this in the future.
What the Girl Scouts want to explain with these examples, is that by "doing" your daughter to give someone a hug simply because she is family or gives her a gift, He could get confused and believe that he "owes" a hug also to other people when they give them a gift or do something nice or nice for them.
About this, Girl Scout psychologist Andrea Bastiani Archibald explains: "The notion about consent might seem something of adults or something that is not relevant to boys, but the lessons that girls learn when they are young about the limits of physical contact and respect they should expect from others, last a whole life and can influence how you feel about your body when you are older. Unfortunately, we know that some adults also bully young children, so educating girls from an early age about consent can help them better understand their rights, know how to identify when someone crosses the line and when they should come to you for help".
The Girl Scout article caused controversy in social networks, because although some people supported the message about the importance of educating from small about consent, others believe they were wrong to sexualize innocent interactions between family members.
However, we must remember that more than 80% of cases of sexual abuse occur in an environment close to the child, and many times, by a family member. And according to information from the Federation of Associations for the Prevention of Child Abuse (FAPMI) and the Council of Europe, one in five children suffer from child sexual abuse.
In the case of girls, the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (National Network of Rape, Abuse and Incest) in the United States, one in nine girls under 18 experience sexual harassment or abuse by an adult and 90% of cases of sexual abuse are by one of the parents or someone in the family.
Education about consent starts at a young age
Precisely because of these figures, we must emphasize the importance of educating children about the limits that people should have and consent. Many cases of abuse could be avoided or detected immediately if we educate our children about these issues from an early age.
Some time ago I had shared my opinion as the mother of a girl, who was not forced to give kisses or hugs if she did not want to. I think it is very important that we put the education and welfare of our children before "looking good" with others. Now, that my daughter does not give kisses or hugs does not mean that she is impolite, she knows that when you arrive at a place you have to greet and be kind to others, but it is not necessary or mandatory to have demonstrations of affection that are uncomfortable to show education or affection.
And of course, this also applies to boys. As parents, we must educate our children to be good people, but we must also give them the space to decide for themselves who they want to show their affection and who doesn't. The most important is Respect their feelings and never put them in situations where they feel uncomfortable, not even "because it's Christmas".
Photos | iStock
Via | Huffington Post
In Babies and more | Kisses and hugs: why not force my daughter to give them if she does not want, Children have to be able to choose who to kiss and who does not, How to protect your child from sexual abuse: warning signs and guidelines for prevention
