I have been practicing colecho for five years and that has been receiving unsolicited advice for five years (like almost all fathers and mothers with any topic related to parenting). In these five years I have gone through different stages in which I have responded differently to these councils.
In the beginning I defended my posture by layer and sword, putting all the meat on the grill if necessary (mentioning literature, studies, etc.). Then I went through a stage in which to avoid these moments I made no mention of how the nights were in my house. I finally concluded that I slept with my children because they slept better, but above all because we all liked to do it and I stopped hiding to use this argument: "I do it because I like being with them."
For a few days I have decided to use a new argument, to add to "why I like it", because after seeing the last woman put her hands on her head with a "you don't know what you are doing", I thought it was necessary A new argument: I sleep with my son to learn to sleep accompanied (which I will explain whenever I use it in an ironic way).
The sooner you learn it, the better
One of the reasons that many parents use when they perform a minimally questioned educational method is one that says that the sooner they learn it, the better.
The one who gives a cheek from time to time to educate his son and to avoid that in the future the things are twisted to him says that he does it so that he already learns what can not be done.
He who points his son to the nursery being very young to begin to interact with children and live in society, for good and for bad, says that, since he will end up living his life in this society we have, as soon as possible Learn it, better.
The one who denies his son something that he has asked for simply for pleasure (because he could give it to him without problems) because he has decided that in life he cannot have everything, he explains that the sooner children realize that, the better.
Well, I get in the car, I join fashion and now it's me who says that, since most of our life we spend sleeping together, I have decided to start from small to teach them how to do it, because The sooner they learn it, the better.
Forcing habits that they will no longer use
The majority of sleep-related methods and recommendations that aim to get a child to sleep alone in their crib are related to techniques to be applied so that children acquire habits that, curiously, will then have to be eliminated.
It is said that babies and children cannot sleep in a family bed, but must do so in a crib. My children have never slept in one because it makes no sense. When they are twenty years old (maybe before, maybe later), they will be willing to share a large bed with their partner and when they live with it they will do so for the rest of their lives. Sorry but I will not teach my children to sleep in a crib if they will sleep in a bed for a lifetime.
It is recommended to add a stuffed animal as a companion for babies so they do not feel alone. However, when they are adults they will share a bed with a loved one, so it seems quite illogical to teach a baby to sleep accompanied by a stuffed animal, probably with tears in between (because he wants to have a loved one next to him), if then we will have to teach him not to do it (and in some cases it will not even be achieved).
Moreover, many children have brothers and many brothers sleep together. You don't even have to wait 20 years for them to start sleeping with a loved one, because they will do so much sooner. Well, what has been said, so that they get used to the day they sleep with their brother, I think that the ideal is that they sleep accompanied by their loved ones since they were little.
Summarizing
To the argumens that I used previously I add this: I sleep with my son to learn to sleep accompanied. The good thing is that I have one more argument, the bad thing is that I will have to explain it and people will not know whether to take me as a joke or seriously (maybe this should be good).
In any case, in a while, according to my mood, I will change my speech again.
