The baby is born and is a great event for the whole family and for friends. But especially it is for parents and their wishes and needs must be taken into account, because they may wish to be alone for the first few days meeting the new family member and the mother recovering from childbirth.
If you do not want to be of those uncomfortable visits or commitment, do not miss this Decalogue for visits to newborns. Surely parents will thank you for having become a guest of the most courteous and aware of their special situation.
Don't go to the hospital, wait until the baby is at home. More and more professionals are recommending that newborns do not receive visitors and it is that the baby and the mother need intimacy in the postpartum period, especially the first 12 hours of the baby is in a very sensitive period to recognize their mother, start breastfeeding ... A cozy environment facilitates the bond with the mother and facilitates breastfeeding, but if the hospital room is a transfer of people (and let's not say if it's noisy people), the needs of mother and baby are being forgotten.
Be a true guest, that is, ask parents when they want you to visit them, that they are the ones who invite you to go see the baby. Of course, nothing visits surprises in these delicate moments. Even so, things can be twisted with a newborn at a given time (because he does not sleep, he is crying, the mother is not well ...), so it is always advisable to call before going to the appointment, to see if really still standing or it is better to postpone it.
Do not visit a newborn in the evening, which is a critical moment in which the family prepares for "the collection" (although in the first days this is a utopia, since it will not take long to be all awake again). With the arrival of the afternoon they try to establish some routines to favor the rest of the baby and the mother and it is better that they are not interrupted or altered by the visits.
Try to maintain certain hygiene and health standards before seeing the baby. Do not visit the baby if you are sick or think you could be, since it is a very delicate stage and it is necessary to avoid as much as possible that the newborn or his parents become infected. Do not smoke in advance of the visit (much less in his presence), do not carry a large amount of cologne or perfume that can disturb the baby and have clean hands in case you touch or take it.
The flowers do not do well in the small room of the hospital or in the room where the baby sleeps, choose another detail for the mother because most likely they take the bouquet to the gallery. It is also best to ask not to be mistaken, but in these cases baby clothes, diapers or hygiene products are usually welcome. And what does the mother like? Chocolate, ham ...? She also deserves a detail.
We all know that they are most "achuchables" and adorable, but don't insist on catching the babyIt is better to ask why the parents may prefer that the "strangers" for the baby not touch it at the moment. If he is sleeping, he abandons the idea because he will most likely wake up if we move it and it is sure that it is a very popular moment of rest, both for the baby and for his parents.
Try to avoid comments that may bother the mother and unsolicited advice: do not compare the baby with others, do not criticize the mode of delivery, the type of feeding chosen or the appearance of the mother. These are comments that are offensive on other occasions, but that at such a sensitive stage for the mother can cause unwanted feelings, increase their tension, their sadness ...
Good visits offer sincere help at home, for any task (from cleaning to preparing some food, making the purchase ...) and to take care of the brothers if there are any, taking care of them in complicated moments also for them, the "dethroned princes".
The mother and the baby need to be calm to give and take the breast, better if it is silent the first days, when the baby arrives from a very cozy and quiet environment and what you want is to feel the closeness of your mother, her smell, Its taste, without interference. Some mothers get nervous if there is someone watching them breastfeed at this time, since they feel insecure, I may not have a good grip on the baby, have some kind of pain ...
Visits to the newborn should be short, do not become eternal so as not to disturb the newborn and let the mother rest. Think that surely before you have been other friends or family and then maybe there will be more "guests" (hence the importance of calling before going to one of these visits), so you have to lighten the meeting. This, except if the parents expressly ask you to stay (usually the most trusted people) to help them in any domestic issue, for which you can also go quite "unnoticed", that is, it will not be necessary to be on top of The mother and the baby.
Remember that, as recent parents, it is best to follow your heart, your instincts, in these special moments and let your wishes be known to those close to you who want to visit so that the encounter with the baby is not a nuisance but rather a great help.
What do you think about these tips to be the perfect guest to visit the newborn? Do you try to follow them regularly? Did they respect them when you had your baby? Maybe they may seem exaggerated, but surely many families would have loved to have more than one visit like these ...
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