Being fathers and mothers, our main responsibility is to see for the well-being of our children. Taking care of their emotional and physical development, as well as educating them, are the challenges and opportunities that we will face every day. During its first years of life, We will be your guides and those people who come to ask for help or guidance.
But also as parents, we must prepare them for the real world and the situations that may arise in their life. Therefore, it is important to educate them not to obey us, but to be able to make good decisions themselves.
As parents, we will always look for the best for our children. Surely if we had the ability to choose a "superpower" of mom or dad, many would always want to protect them from all those who could harm them, or perhaps be that voice that indicates the safe path.
However, we must keep in mind that while we are your main caregivers and providers during your first years of life, we are a kind of guides and teachers, that we will be teaching them everything we can, until the day comes when they begin to become independent and eventually embark on the flight.
In Babies and more Tips for positive discipline by age and stage, recommended by the American Academy of PediatricsPerhaps that whole matter of "leaving the nest" or the parents' house is something far away for many, especially for those of us who have small children who still depend on us for most things. But the truth is that from an early age we must educate them so that tomorrow they are happy and safe adults.
Why it is so important that they learn to make decisions
Educating our children as children so that they are able to make decisions will make them autonomous and competent adults. Starting to make decisions is something that helps them to begin to mature and to show them that they are able to choose between one thing or another, and that doing so will have an impact - big or small - on their future.
As adults, we make decisions every day, some as simple as choosing what to eat or what to wear, and some more complex, such as accepting or not a job proposal. With this, I want to say that decisions are in our daily lives and it's something we constantly doTherefore, it is important that our children begin to do so as well.
How can we educate them to make good decisions
Now, for our children to make good decisions, it is essential to educate them in values. Knowing about responsibility, generosity, kindness or honesty are some of the key values so that little by little they are able to learn to make the right decisions.
A simple way to start teaching our children how to make decisions is to ask them simple questions or give examples of what would happen if they choose one thing or another. When we teach them, for example, that their actions have consequences, they will understand that they must think carefully about what they do before acting.
An extremely important part of this process is to start giving them the opportunity to decide. At first it can cost us work, because we already know how to act and what will happen if we choose this or that, but we must allow them to choose too. In this way, we will show you that your voice and opinion are important to us.
In Babies and more "Time out" and "thinking chair": an expert in positive discipline explains why we should not use these methodsBut in addition to beginning to express their opinions or preferences, giving them the opportunity to decide will allow them to make mistakes and thus learn from their mistakes. We can also set an example of this, since if we make a decision that in the end does not turn out to be the best, we can explain what happened and the alternative that would have been ideal. Or, make them part of our moment of decision and explain why we choose one thing and not another.
The most important thing: teach them to think, not think for them
The most important part of allowing them to make decisions is the teach them to think for themselves and not to simply obey because mom or dad think something is the best. If we make all the decisions for them, when it's time for them to do it, they probably won't know what to do or how to act.
Remember to work on your self-esteem, to that our children are sure of themselves and that they know that they have the ability to choose. Little by little and making them partakers also of moments in which decisions are made within the family, they will learn the basis for in the future, to be adults capable of making good decisions.
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