In Babies and more we have commented on several occasions that babies born now have very few differences (or none) with babies born thousands of years ago.
Despite this, many adults and many parents tend to have a somewhat rigid perception of the evolution and abilities of babies and expect them to behave, from an early age, in this or that way.
Phrases such as "cry for vice", "cry for attention", "is smarter than hunger", "is manipulating you" and similar make babies are seen as small people able to reason and with the ability to handle to his parents (or try to do it), when the reality is that the brain of the baby and the child is so immature that most acts are instinctive and not very emotional.
The human brain consists of three brains
The brain of babies (and that of adults) consists of three parts or brains: the reptilian brain, the mammalian or emotional brain and the human or rational brain.
The three are connected to each other and each of them has its own functions and according to the experiences and sensations we have we will use one or the other brain.
The more our children use the human or rational brain, the less they will use the other brains, the more primitive and instinctive. It is because of that We parents must help our children to grow so that they gradually learn to control the strong reactions that reptilian and mammalian brains can produce.
To help them we need to know the characteristics of these three brains. This way we will understand why babies and children are as they are and why they act as they act.
The reptilian brain
He reptile brain It appeared in evolution 300 million years ago. It is a rather instinctive brain that relies primarily on survival. It controls bodily functions such as hunger, digestion and elimination, breathing, circulation, temperature, territorial instincts and the instinct to escape and fight (as you can see, a whole pack of “accessories” to preserve the life and safety of oneself).
You could say that it is the part of the brain that acts most when a baby is born. His main concern is to ensure food, heat and in general maintain vital signs and optimal well-being. At the moment when some of this is missing or fails, the baby claims it, because it is precisely what he needs to continue living.
The mammalian brain
This part of the brain is almost equal to the chimpanzee's brain. It is also called emotional brain, since it is responsible for generating emotions that the human or rational brain has to learn to control.
This brain helps the rational to control the escape and fight instincts of the reptilian brain and it depends on fear, anger, social relationships, separation anguish, play, maternal (and paternal) instinct, the exploratory impulse, etc.
You could say that it is the "heart" of people. When someone says "my head tells me to do A, but my heart tells me to do B", it is the emotional brain of which it speaks.
The rational, the one who weighs things according to the knowledge acquired and the intelligence of the person is the one who says “A”, the emotional brain, which causes us a worm in the stomach when we see the person we love, who we It makes you cry of sadness and joy among many other things is the one that says "B", in this example.
The human or rational brain
He rational brain It is the part of the brain that developed later at the evolutionary level and is the one that envelops and in some way controls the other two brains, older and more instinctive.
The functions of this brain are creativity, imagination, the ability to solve problems, to reason and reflect, kindness, empathy, compassion, responsibility, etc.
It is this brain that differentiates us from the rest of animals, since it is the one that gives us the power to reason (which is not simply to think, since animals also think, but the ability to think about what we have already thought or what we have done before. It is therefore the brain that allows us to evolve as a species.
The three brains must interact
Once explained one can think that the human brain is the one that must always send and that it must annul the other two, which are more aggressive, instinctive and dangerous.
The truth is Ideally, everyone should be operational and interact with the wise management of the rational brain, but allowing the emotional and reptilian brains to "have a voice."
If, for example, a child grows up with low self-esteem, for whatever reason, and bases his learning and experiences on continuous hearts to avoid being harmed, he may end up by listening to his mammalian brain as a defense mechanism, moving on to live a life too rational, no ability to enter into emotional relationships.
Similarly, there is a risk of losing the ability to empathize. If we fight for the individuality of our children, if we teach them to compete too much to always be winners (and therefore the other losers), we can make them disconnect that part of the rational brain that would help them think about others and that the child does not I ended up importing the discomfort of other people too much.
It is for this reason that the three brains must exist and coexist, providing their stimuli as appropriate, but with the management of the rational brain, that we can sometimes disconnect at will to rest a little (a while watching programs of the heart or "The Diary" For example, it is a perfect exercise of not thinking - at the risk that trying to disconnect causes the loss of some neuron, because of how bad these programs are -, playing something, feeling emotions, caresses, hugs ... ).
It depends on us how your human brain will develop
A few months ago Eduard Punset He stated in his program networks that the ideal is for children to be raised by their parents up to six years. He did not say it because he did, nor because he believes that the woman has to be at home taking care of the children (she has been crossed out as a macho), but she did it thinking about children.
Those first six years make up the stage in which the human brain develops mostly and is the most critical part for both good and bad.
The type of upbringing we offer and our responses to their actions and reactions (probably guided by their reptilian and mammalian brains) will influence their way of learning to use the rational brain.
The more understanding we are and the more we help them manage their “problems,” the better they will learn to manage themselves. The more damage we do to them in the form of physical or verbal aggression, in the form of abandonment or ignoring them, more we can damage your self-esteem and your emotional brain and more time will be the rational brain concerned with "acting" to balance those shortcomings ("I find it hard to love and give everything, but I know to pretend that I love and give everything").
Photos | Flickr - Adam Selwood, Zack Akukumba, bartdubelaar, rumpleteaser, Kyle and Kelly Adams
In Babies and more | Documentary: The baby's brain by Eduardo Punset (I), (II) and (III), Punset: Five tips to make a baby a capable and happy adult, Child stress could damage the brain
