There are few days left for school vacations, and then the summer camps will begin. The offer is very wide: from urban camps, to thematic or overnight camps, where children spend one or several days away from home.
If for the first time your child will sleep outside the home, it is likely that you are both nervous about the event. "Will you be prepared for it?", "Will you miss us?", "What do I do if you cry when the time comes?" ... There are many doubts about it that assail us parents (and probably also our children) .
Therefore, we have spoken with Lorena García Vega, pedagogue, Montessori guide and child and family educator to find out how to address this moment for parents and children to enjoy the experience.
1. The child must participate in the election of his camp
Whether for the activities offered, such as the schedule or other logistic aspects, on many occasions it is the parents themselves who choose the summer camp to which our children will attend.
But, according to the expert, the child should also be able to actively participate in the election, after all it is an experience that only he will live, and with which he must be convinced and happy from the beginning:
In Babies and more Summer camps: how to choose the best one for my child"If, for whatever reason, a camp with an overnight stay is chosen, both parents and children should live the experience from the tranquility. What does this mean? Well, both parties must choose the camp. First, parents will make a selection of camps they deem most appropriate to give their child a choice. And then, with the sieve done, the child can choose the option he likes best. "
"Because if we choose our child first, without having previously assessed the options, we run the risk that the child chooses a camp that, for whatever reason, we do not like and leads us to reject his choice , with the negative consequences that this can bring to the child's self-esteem "- says Lorena García.
2. Parents must be completely convinced with the choice
But let's think for a moment in the opposite case: our son has never left camp away from home, but this year he insistently asks us because "All his friends are going and he doesn't want to miss the experience".
What to do? On the one hand, we want to have a good time and enjoy, but on the other we feel doubtful or even certain fears invade us due to a specific situation or a bad personal experience. In this case, Lorena advises us:
"If parents are going to feel distressed it is preferable that the child does not go to any camp with these characteristics, because feelings can end up triggering a bad experience for everyone. "
In Babies and more Summer camps when your child is allergic: tips to keep in mind"And it is that if we transmit anguish, distrust and fear, the child will end up absorbing all that negative energy, and it is very unfair that the emotional burden of the parents will drag the children."
"But, in spite of everything, we make the decision to take our son to a camp with overnight, parents have to extract the positive from the situation and stay with how well our son will have a good time. Because if he child is fine, parents will be too. "
3. Provide the child with confidence and security
Children who face camping for the first time away from home can live it in several ways. From the enthusiasm and joy overflowed from the first moment, to the emotion contained or even nerves and crying as the date approaches.
And it is precisely this last attitude that generates great anxiety in parents, who wonder how to act:
"Sometimes, it is not so scary what you have, but insecurity of facing an unknown situation. But if the child understands that he is capable of doing so and, in addition, he feels confident that he is not alone, he is likely to try to take on the new challenge. ""If even having participated in the election of his own camp with overnight, days before going the child begins to live it with anguish, it is important to normalize the situation and understand that it is logical to feel that way, because it is a totally new experience for him who will live autonomously "
"However, we must assess the situation of each family and each child in particular, as well as analyze the level of distress the child is experiencing. On the one hand, It is recommended that you go, because that way we will be giving him the confidence that he is able to spend a few days away from home without us. But, on the other hand, it is essential to transfer to the child the security and tranquility that, if he is not comfortable and not having a good time, we will go find him".
4. Calls or visits? Yes, but maintaining balance
One of the main advantages that social networks and mobile phones give us is the possibility of always being connected and find out about any news at the click of a button. In this sense, there are many camps that are posting photographs and notifications through their blogs, networks or whatsapp groups, so that parents are informed at all times.
And if we also have somewhat older children who have their own mobile phones, it is easy to be tempted to write or call them continuously to find out how they are doing. But… How to get calm without obsessing or overwhelming them?
"Calls and visits can be a very good way to board a camp overnight, as long as a balance is established. Calling, going or asking too much just shows distrust towards the capacity of the child on his autonomy to face the experience, as well as towards the organization of the camp ".
"That anguish will be transmitted to our children, and we will not be able to live the experience in a relaxed, positive and productive way."
"It is much more recommended wait for the monitors to contact the family to indicate when calls or visits can be made. However, if a timely consultation by parents arises, it is also better to resolve it as soon as possible for our peace of mind. "
In the case of long-stay camps, where the possibility of visiting the child is offeredLorena advises "Show enthusiasm and interest in what our son tells us, instead of subjecting him to the classic interrogation of are you eating? Are you behaving well? Do you obey the monitors? ...".
"Instead of overwhelming the child with these types of questions, we can formulate more positive ones that also help us to know more details of what our son is doing, such as how are you doing? What activities are the ones you like best?… "
5. Monitors and organizers, respectful of the child's emotions
And related to the topic of calls and visits, Lorena advises that before choosing a camp we inform ourselves very well about this aspect, and clarify any questions related to the way organizers have to address the child's emotional management.
If your children are going to spend a few days away from home, we want these tips to help you face the moment in a relaxed way, and convey to the child the confidence and security he needs to live this experience in a positive way."Personally, I do not agree with the camps where families are expressly prohibited from contacting their children, claiming that calls or visits emotionally destabilize them. Isolation will not make the child enjoy more, but quite the opposite. "
"It is true that some children get excited when their parents call or go to see them, but they already have enough understanding to know that in a few days they will return to their homes again. Therefore, the organizers of the camp, far from prohibiting contact with families, should convey to children the confidence that they are in a safe place and with friends, that they are not alone and that they can see or hear their parents when they wish it. "
Photos | iStock, Pixabay
Acknowledgments | Lorena García Vega - ConnectEmotions
